I Just can’t Relax - what’s wrong with me?

Welcome to the 21st century…  where time is regarded as precious.  There’s just not enough of it to do everything you need to do.  Everything runs at such a fast pace, you find yourself prioritizing, just to keep up.

Your calendar is probably full for the month, and you’re already half-way to filling up next month’s as well.  Then there’s the clashing of invites from different friends or relatives, which leads to you spending so much time, you don’t have, on worrying which one you have to let down.

This technological age we live in has expanded our world.  It has offered us the ability to experience life in a totally different way than ever before.  It encourages us to learn, communicate and expand our understanding of the world and the people in it.  But it all takes time.

So if you can’t relax, and are wondering why, there are a couple of reasons you need to consider …

Firstly, you may have put yourself into a ‘self-expectation loop’, whereby you just can’t pull yourself away from being busy, as well as being there for everyone else.  Another way to put it would be to say “you don’t want to miss out on what’s going on”, so all of your time is directed towards what you expect from yourself, and what you believe other people want from you.

Secondly, it’s about how much energy you put into your busy life, and the stress that comes with it that prevents you from feeling relaxed.  This will also affect your sleep pattern, with many people not being able to get into a deep sleep, to rejuvenate and re-charge their body.  Instead, waking up as tired as they were the night before.  Too many people suffer from the ‘I can’t relax syndrome’ and it’s affecting their lives.  It’s no fun dragging yourself out of bed every morning, feeling absolutely exhausted, especially when that calendar is so full of what you have to do that day.

That’s when the thoughts arrive of “what I wouldn’t give to lie on a beach today, with nothing to do.  Just sit back, relax, have a drink. Feel the warm sun on me.  Mmm .. that would be so good!  I wish I didn’t have to go to work today”.   Now, what’s wrong with this picture?  Human behavior seems to have a way about it to want something when it’s not possible (when you need to meet your obligations and go to work).  But when it is possible, they don’t want it (weekend or other free time), they simply have too much to do.

If you’ve ever had those thoughts first thing in the morning, then it’s your body’s way of saying “I’ve had enough.  I want to relax.  Just stop, why don’t you! Take me where I can just switch off from this busy life”.  That’s when you need to listen, and take the next opportunity to do just that.  Don’t wait.  Do it as soon as you can.  Give all those thoughts a rest.

There are different types of relaxation.  Sport, hobbies, reading, having coffee with friends, dining out, watching TV, surfing the net.   But remember, your brain is still taking in information, sorting it out, evaluating it and storing it in the subconscious for it to be retrieved at a later time.  Whilst this is called relaxation, there’s an even better way to relax.

It’s when you give yourself the gift of time that does not involve others. This type of relaxation enables you to get back in touch with what you feel, rather than what you think.  Your brain is not overloaded with information.  Your breathing slows and, guess what?  You begin to relax.  It’s that easy.  It’s simply taking time-out for you, instead of being there for everyone else.

When you relax you also change your brain pattern away from the Beta state, which is associated with concentration and alertness.  In the Beta state neurons fire in rapid succession, helping you achieve peak performance. However, when you really begin to relax – you then enter the Alpha state, where your brain activity slows from the rapid patterns of Beta into the more gentle rhythm of Alpha.  This is when you feel truly relaxed, and your creativity and visualization is at its best.  You can then view your life with a greater sense of insight, enabling you to make decisions that were so difficult to do when you were feeling so tired and stressed.

If you would like to take a further step towards creating the life you want, and the future you deserve, I have created a Program titled ‘Creating the Future you want‘, which is available under the Mind Travel section of The Journey Home website.  This program will take you on a personal journey, mind travelling forward in time to view and experience your ‘most likely future’. You will then travel back in time to heal your past, become empowered to make change, then experience a guided Mind Travel exercise to create and experience your ‘new future’.

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